As is true with most cities on this side of the country it is FREEZING cold in my little town today. However, my yoga pal and I did not use this dip in the temperature to derail our Bikram Yoga plans. Siobhan and I braved the ice and headed downtown to get our workout in!
The good news is I felt a lot stronger than even just a week ago and I was really giving it a good try. I need to mention again how understanding and amazing the instructors are here. They are exactly what I was hoping for when I decided to give hot yoga a try. Tonight, I was listening carefully to the instruction, following along as best I could, and really making an effort to do the poses correctly (even those I cannot fully go into yet). The bad news is I overdid it a touch in the beginning and ended up in a child’s pose for the last 10-15 minutes of the 90 minute class. This was a little discouraging and while the spirit was willing, the body simply was not able (at this point). I mostly felt proud of my effort but I could also feel that oh too familiar “you have no business doing this” feeling creeping in.
Here is what I want to say tonight. When you start to feel intimidated, upset, or discouraged it is so important to understand that you have just as much right as ANYONE to be there. If you find a fitness activity you enjoy, start taking a class or join a gym these moments of self-doubt will creep in. Acknowledge them, work though them, and put them away. Tonight I had a random girl in class say to me “Oh you’re just doing once or twice a week? Mmm well I guess you’ve got to start somewhere.” And while I get that she was kind of being a bitch, she was also kind of right. You do have to start somewhere. I am not going to be perfect in two weeks, two months, or even two years but just the act of doing and growing is so important. I wager in two month’s time I will look back at this and smile remembering just how much I have learned and changed in that amount of time. You’re journey is about you and you alone. Tonight, I grew just a little and it felt pretty fantastic!
Namaste~